If I cry, kick, scream when you leave, even if it’s only for an hour and I’m with someone I know and like, I may be saying, “I need you. I depend on you. I’m afraid you are going to disappear for a long time, too, just like my deployed parent.” You can support me by giving me a little warning, then tell me when you are going away. Yes, I may cry, but I’m learning that I can trust you not to abandon me. Leave me with someone I know and trust. Reassure me that you will come back just like you always do. If possible, tell me when you’re coming back in a way I can understand, such as, “I’m going to be back after your nap.” Give me a reminder of you to hold—a photo of us, your t-shirt or cap, a note. When I hold onto it and am comforted, I may be saying, “This smells like Daddy. It helps me to feel safe and close to him.”
