Another way you can help me with my challenging behaviors is to work to understand the meaning of my behaviors.  In other words, how might my behaviors tell you what I’m thinking and feeling.  You can strive to make sense of my behaviors using the tools of wondering, being curious, and noting, such as, “I wonder why my toddler seems to be having a hard time today?”  “I’m wondering if they are missing their mom?” “I’m wondering if I can give words to my toddler to deal with frustration and prevent their biting?”; “I notice that my toddler gets more upset when I’m upset.  I’m curious if I am calm maybe my little one will feel more settled and regulated?”

When you use wondering, you are thinking of my perspective.  That helps to you to be responsive to my behaviors and needs, with patience and empathy, which can contribute to strengthening our growing bond and my positive social-emotional development and wellness. 

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